i was born in redondo beach and raised in dallas, so i guess you can call me a california girl who’s roots are deep in the heart of texas. though dallas is home, traveling is always at the forefront of my mind. i adore exploring different cultures and expanding my horizons!
my love for fashion has been tightly sewn through interning in wardrobe for gossip girl, the michael kors showroom, and reporting for new york, paris, and montreal fashion weeks. but style is what has really stolen my heart, which incorporates all of life. cooking new recipes, learning new languages, meeting new people, indulging my curiosities, and stretching my imagination are my general crushes, and my blog is my outlet for sharing my inspirations. thanks for following!
in addition to lolo, i am currently writing for: fashion reporters, smustyle, myitthings, and prcouture.
LOLO MAGAZINE
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Lauren, My heart goes out to you following your accident last weekend. Thoughts and prayers are with you during this difficult time of healing.
Lauren,
I have read everything there is about you since your horrible accident. Everyday I read about your updates from your mom…and your mom is one of the most amazing women that I know. I have been on a personal roller coaster ride in my life and just reading what your mom has posted over the past month or so has really got to me thanking more about how I live my life and the things I need to change. I was ready to throw in the towel after a marriage of 12 years and I read the story about your mom and dad and now I have had a change in heart about leaving my husband..Things haven’t been this good in my married in years now and its thanks to you and your family that I have found the kind and loving husband that I’ve had all along. You are a very strong woman and God has a plan for you. I pray for you to get passed the pain that you are feeling and recover very soon.
Again your story has changed me in ways that you will ever no.
I think that in a spiritual and emotional way, Lauren’s story will serve as an inspiration to many…either directly or indirectly… Her parents story is also a true inspiration already to many… This family, in their tragedy will help many others to get through their own very difficult times with grace, dignity and an interest in doing the right thing at the right time… God bless this family…
Lauren your still the most beautiful girl. Even with your injuries they still cant take away your beauty. Keep following your dreams, now you will be a rolemodel for millions of people with life changing problems. Heres to a speedy recovery.
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Many many prayers being sent…..
I too have been injured in an accident. I lost my left leg below the knee. I just want you to know, you will not only survive, you will STRIVE! It will take courage, strength, and be painful at times, but you can continue to have a wonderful life. Rely on your friends and family and find a great prosthetist. A prosthetic specialist that you can tell “I want to do this…….” and he says “when?”
Also speak with other people that have survived similar injuries. Remember it is ok to be angry and sad. But also never forget that you can do this!
I try to turn my anger into productive energy. Some days are easier than others.
With the right attitude, determination, support and love, you will STRIVE! I was snow skiing on one leg 6below weeks
I sent second half of comment please look for ending.
Lauren, I am very sorry to here of your accident, when your lying in your hospital bed and you are all alone with your thoughts, please don’t get down, don’t focus on the negative, don’t focus on the how’s , why’s and what ifs, what has happened to you has happened , there is no going back. You must move one, move forward, keep your spirit up and push on darlin’, you have your life, you can still live it, it will be full of challenges and difficulties no question but it will also ground you and give you a strength and will and fire you had no idea you had. You keep your chin up, smile your little heart out and show everyone who Lauren is and what she can do. Please don’t worry about the aesthetics it is not important, this was your path, this had to happen i guess for some reason or another but it should not disable you or discourage you, please don’t give up on your dreams , you can be bigger and better than you are and i believe you will over come and live a long happy life. Im thinking of you today and i wish you all the success and i send my love from Canada!! In my eyes and your families eyes you are ever as beautiful inside and out. xoxo
Please get well very soon. We have all learned of your horribly accident today and we are praying for your full recovery.
Read that you were severely injured over the weekend…I hope you make a full recovery. My thoughts are with you. I love your blog!
Lauren and family,
I read about your accident online and just wanted you to know you are in my thoughts and prayers this holiday season.
i looked up your blog when i saw your parents on gma, best wishes on your recovery and prayers during this difficult time.
Wishing you Godspeed on your recovery. You are loved and we look forward to reading your columns again soon.
Hi Lauren, my name is Kaitlyn Im soooo sorry about the accident… I have been praying for you all day today, and will continue praying for how ever long it may take for you to recover. Keep perusing your dreams! I love your articles and hope to keep reading them.
With lots of love and prayers- Kaitlyn
May the Lord help you with a quick recovery.
Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
Your magazine is lovely and shows real talent. Hope you get back to it soon!
I’m so sorry.
Wishing and praying for you a fast and speedy recovery…. none-the-less God is good. Stay strong and be encouraged.
I hope for your speedy recovery. Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
Dear Lauren:
Special little girl, beautiful lady. I just heard from the news about your accident and about you losing your hand. I just wanted to write and let you know that the same thing happened to me back in 1996, and to offer my support and friendship to you…
I too was a model. I was Miss Wyoming/Miss USA — and in a profession where looks count. But I have learned that I had an “inner’ beauty which strangely enough, having my hand amputated help me realize that my “outer” beauty was not what was important at all. In time, honey you will come to realize this as well.
I wanted to let you know that if you need a “big sister” that I am available any hour of the day or night. If you feel depressed or blue or not sure about how you can go on or just having a “pity party” (like I used to have) please call me at 718-406-1089. I love you hon, and God loves you too. He is there to help us get through crises like this. I wanted to offer you my friendship and share my story with you…
It was a hot summer August day in 1996. I was at my isolated farm in the mountains of North Carolina. when I was attached by a huge mastiff sized dog that had gone crazy due to an overdose of prednisone from a bee sting. He attacked me without a warning, tore off my left hand almost up to my elbow, and three fingers off my right hand, and he ripped out my intestines from stomach. He tore my right leg apart into the bone. I was bleeding to death! I managed to crawl (with him on top of me tearing me apart) next door to an empty apartment where I’d been keeping a little stray dog I had found, (a little pitbull I’d named “Booger”) who I’d found starving on the road (going through garbage cans) a few months earlier. I screamed “Help me Jesus!” HELP ME Booger! And (with the crazed animal on top of me chewing at my flesh) and with no hands (one was hanging off) managed to crawl to the next door apartment and to get the door open! Booger burst out and jumped on the other animal despite the fact that he was three times his size) and saved my life! I somehow managed to pick up my severed left hand, crawl to my farm truck, and drive with only my elbows, gushing blood each time my heart beat, across a hundred acres of horse pasture– to my neighbors, while going into shock. (I guess the survival mechanism kicks in! I was getting weaker from loss of blood and going into shock, getting weaker with each passing second. i was afraid they would find me dead the next morning. I was so sacred! I fell forward on the truck horn;it went B-E-E-E-P and my neighbors heard me, came, saw the blood and got my parents, who somehow managed (after ramming into the fence and my neighbors car in a panic) to get me to the local small hospital,. who said if I could live till I got to Winston Salem Baptist in Winston Salem, they would try to re-attach my hand. On the way down there in the long ambulance ride, I locked horns with Death. I felt Its icy grip on me, but I fought it. And I asked God to help me live. And He heard my cry. I somehow survived the three-hour ambulance ride (they couldn’t air lift me due to fog in the mountains) and a team of trauma surgeons were there to waiting for me. I was in surgery FOURTEEN HOURS, but they reattached what was left of my hand. The little dog who had saved my life survived too–even though the larger dog had chewed him all to pieces. For months we healed together. And we bonded. The doctors had me on strong drugs for pain. I wasn’t used to them and stayed only half conscious a haze of agony. I got severely depressed–even when I went home. I had to use a wheelchair and be pushed around because both my hands were useless. I felt useless too. I was home but my parents couldn’t handle it. Their beautiful daughter–once gorgeous enough to run for the MISS USA Crown!…I was scarred now without the use of a hand. I could see their looks of pity in their eyes. It hurt so bad when I heard my father say to the nurses: “Will she always be scarred like this?” and my mother said “I can’t take care of her. Put her in a mental hospital”. I wasn’t crazy, I’d just lost use of a limb. It hurt. But God, and my little dog, stuck by my side during all this. And God will stick by you to my beauty Lauren. The Bible says He will “never leave or forsake you.” But anyway, in my case, felt abandoned by God too, in fact by the whole
world. I had Pity parties. I got depressed. And like many other people who have lost their limbs or use of one of them, I thought about suicide. How could I go on? I was a pianist. I had done a PhD in Theatre. I had ben a model, like you. I had run for the MISS USA beauty crown. I had planned to write a book. (How would I type?) That’s right, Lauren my sister, I was considered one of the most beautiful women in America to run for a national beauty crown. I had done modeling and acting in television and films and onstage and had worked with celebrities. And now, I felt ugly and scared. I couldn’t play the piano anymore, or use my hands. “How would I learn a living?” I reasoned at the time. “What good are my college degrees?” I thought sadly. “My PhD is worthless,” I thought. But you know what Lauren, in time, I learned I was wrong. VERY wrong. You can do with one hand what you used to do with TWO. Only you just have to learn to do them a little ….differently, that’s all. (As my funny occupational therapist Meg used today “There are your One-Hand Things and your Two Hand Things and you just have to figure out HOW to still do all the Two-Hand Things with One Hand”. (I accomplished this in time, and thought about writing a book “My One Hand Things” Ha Ha! Yep Meg, you were right! ) And always…ALWAYS…God was at my side. He never left me, even when my own parents did. I remember one day I was thinking about suicide. The pain from the amputation–I guess they call it “phantom pain” was so bad, and the drugs didn’t help, They just dulled it it was still there, and left me groggy. I felt like my hand was in a fireplace and I couldn’t take it out. LIke it was burning. I just wanted to die. So I called a several churches to anoint me with oil, but none of them wold come. (These hypocrites had read some tabloid slander about me and looked down on me–not realizing that tabloid trash comes with the territory of acting or modeling– they had believed the tabloid lies from years ago and now thought I “deserved” what I was getting! So I had no one. I thought about suicide and how easy it would be to go to sleep and just wake up in heaven. After calling churches who were too cold hearted and pious to come to even pray for me and anoint me with oil for healing (which is what the Bible says to do), I grew downcast. No one cared, and so I called a priest, determined to end my own life. And you know what he said Lauren? He said “My child, my child. You are just having a DARK NIGHT OF THE SOUL. And this, too, will pass.” And you know what Lauren? It did. It DID pass. With His help (and you can only go so low, ya know…And you have two choices: You can live. OR you can die. And I chose to live, and I had God’s help (Praise his glorious name) and I had another friend, my little dog who with me had survived the vicious animal attack, at my side. As night turned to day, and weeks passed, then months went by, and seasons changed, I lost track of time. I got so bored lying there. But Booger’s antics kept me going. (God rents us out angels during the tough times, ya know!) One day, I took my wheelchair to the barn to feed my horses. My dad fussed, saying I needed to keep what was left of my arms clean and couldn’t get germs on me. But I was determined to feed my horses. I know that sounds like such a little thing, but I knew I if I couldn’t feed my horses I really WASN”T worth anything, so I was determined to try. Feeding them involved simply getting the scoop, and manipulating it into the big metal feed can and then somehow filing the scoop with horse grain and then manipulating the scoop into my horse’s feed bucket. Well, I dropped the scoop several times. Frustration City. Elbows didn’t seem to function as well as my old hands….But ya know what girlfriend, I eventually mastered the art of holding the scoop with my elbows and feeding my Babies” (My fave name for my “horse children”. Ha! Ha!) And guess what Lauren, they didn’t even know the difference! To them I was still “Mom”. The food tasted just as good to them if I fed them with my ELBOWS as it did when I fed them with my HANDS! You see what I was saying girlfriend? I accomplished the same task–only a different way. AND MY HORSES GOT FED! …a Victory for me.
And I had another surprise for me when I got back from the barn. Booger (the little stray dog who had healed with me) was always in the yard waiting for me. I couldn’t figure out how he got out of the house. I always shut the door with my foot, and it locked automatically behind me. How was he doing it? He just keep getting out in the yard over and over. I couldn’t figure it out. So one day I rolled my wheelchair over to the side window of my house and peeked in. Bingo, there was ol’ BoogerOPENING THE FRONT DOOR WITH HIS TEETH! He would twist the inner lock, then open the outer part of the doorknob–with his teeth! (Honest injun! I will send you a picture of him doing it to prove it! And that wasn’t all …Booger began working as a official service dog for me, pulling my wheelchair when the battery went down, or pulling me out of the bathtub (he seemed to understand that my hands and legs didn’t work) and he’d help me get up off the floor. He could dial 911, and get my towels out of the dryer. I’d say “Booger, go get me a towel” and here he’d come dragging me one! He’d also get me a soda I’d say “Booger get me a pop” and he’d go pull a cloth doughnut on the handle of the fridge, reach in, get a soda, and drop it into my lap. He was the greatest dog. He also helped me–gave me the courage to–walk again, and he could take off my coat when I came in, and remove my pants by puling them off one leg at a time and then at the waist, and then again on each leg, then repeat till they were all the way down. He could also pull off T- shirts over my head, coz my hands were useless… But most of all, he gave me courage and taught me to keep going. In time, we began visiting other people who like me had had amputations of limbs and were down and out. My surgeon said “Joyce you have such a good attitude. Can you talk to my other patients and give them some of that Joy juice?: And I did. Even at Christmas Booger and I would ride my little “Crip scooter” (as I laughingly called it), full of Christmas cookies, to VA centers and old folks homes, where we I sang and did a Christmas program for those who had no one. In a year we went to school and churches and talked about service animals so people would known what he was–after winning a lawsuit under ADA law when we were denied services by a rude hillbilly manager at a CVS pharmacy who refused us services because I was “handicapped with a service dog”. Booger pulled me daily up the hill to the court house, as we wanted to make a difference for the world–to make things better for others like me who were physically challenged. And we did. We won a huge lawsuit under ADA law against CVS pharmacy, and educated my backwoods county in North Carolina about service animals and why they’re so important to people who have lost limbs or the use of arms or legs!
When the hurricane and flood waters washed over my home–even the yard I played in as a child–I was determined to come to Hollywood and write “The Story of Bernann and Booger”. For as I sat on a hillside and watched my home being destroyed, I was still determined to survive…and I promised God if he’d help me to not drown, I could come to Hollywood and tell my story, even if I had to type it with ONE HAND! A good friend (who I’d met when I was bed fast, through a computer chat line, who had sent me little cards to cheer me up and help me keep going) offered me a place to stay while I wrote.
I got a top agent on Sunset Blvd. and was in Los Angeles writing a book based on my life and its screenplay adaption. )I type with one hand and make a lot of mistakes, but I write.) And the production company of gorgeous talented actress Virginia Madison even wanted to see the script when I finished it! Yep, ol’ Booger and I were all set and ready to walk the Red Carpet. The sad part was that my beloved Booger got cancer and despite me spending all my savings my old friend died in my arms in 2006… The saddest day of my life. I had lost not only my best friend, but a wonderful service dog who had won awards from the National Service Dog Association. I was consumed with depression and grief…I sobbed from the depth of my soul…I almost didn’t pull out of it…But every cloud has a silver lining. In 2008, some Korean scientists from Seoul National University, and a stem cell research company, amazed at Booger’s high doggie IQ and unbelievable talents, put ten million dollars into research and they CLONED HIM, and I now have his five beautiful puppies who I am training as service animals for physically challenged people like myself! I have discovered a talent I never knew I had. And that is training service dogs for physically challenged people. And my Life is full once again. You see my friend, Lauren, The Universe has a way giving back to us…
So what I’m saying, my beautiful little sister, is that this is not the end for you–losing your hand I mean. There are many things ahead for you — as you will discover in yourself, an inner Beauty, an inner strength and perseverance that you never knew you had. You are STILL beautiful. You are still YOU. Look at that gorgeous newscaster who HAD NO ARMS. A beautiful lady. And a great newscaster! What an inspiration she is for people like me and you! Look at that surfer whose arm was bit off by a shark, in the film “Soul Surfer”–She went on (without an arm) to WIN the surfing championship–she just had to figure out a different way to balance on her board with ONE ARM. Why? Because she did not give up. Because inside each of us there is that survival instinct. That inner self which says “I WILL SURVIVE AND KEEP ON TRUCKING.” It is with my humble prayer that I write this letter. I want you to know that even though we have never met, that YOU ARE LOVED LAUREN. By GOD. By ME. By your FAMILY. And you WILL survive this terrible accident. Even if you feel like you can’t make it right now. That still small part of you will kick in (as it did for me), and you will one day, like me, give strength to others.
I will remember to keep you in my nightly prayers. And your parents, that they will remain strong for you. I am your pal, and if you need a cheerful listening ear, from “someone who has been there, done that and bought the T-shirt,” don’t hesitate to call me at 718-406-1089.
Your friend, “Miss Wyoming USA 1973”
Joyce (“Joy”) Bernann McKinney
(And Booger’s clones: Service dogs Booger Mack, Booger Park, Booger Hong, Booger Lee, and Booger Ra)
Ms. McKinney, please tell the truth.
http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/26209219/ns/today-today_people/t/woman-who-had-dogs-cloned-wanted-tenn/
Lauren, I am so sorry to hear about your accident….Many prayers go out to you! And just to respond to Jen, I read that story that Ms. McKinney wrote, I had to look her up! And wow is all I can say!
You are BOTH incredible women. What an amazing, inspiring story. God bless you both!
Lady, I just a photo of you from after when you say you had your supposed accident and you have both hands, no problems at all other than the fact that you are crazy as a loon. This young lady has gone through a horrific accident, and is with God’s grace making a recovery and you have the nerve to put your made up life story on here. Shame on you, and God bless you Lauren. From a fellow Dallas girl, I know you will be just great. God has plans for you my dear.
Lauren,
Wishing you all the best and a speedy recovery!
I am in Shreveport LA. My prayers have been with you since the moment I heard the news. I am following your story and looking forward to continuous good news on your progress. Stay spiritual, keep your faith in God and pray for the strength to move forward. We as Christians don’t ask god why ? We ask for courage and direction where to go from here. Good luck. I know you will soar like an eagle !!
Prayers from LA.
Praying for your recovery and to be surrounded by loving help during this time
I just wanted to leave my prayers and good thoughts here for you too, Lauren. We all look forward to the day when you are back and blogging again, but don’t rush or worry. Take the time you need to heal, and we will keep cheering for you and hoping for good things!
grace and peace~*~
Didn’t even know about this Blog or you before this awfull accident. You have been in my prayers since. You have amazing talent and I believe you will contininue to do great things . I LOVE your Blog and my friends and I will contininue to follow you!! You are beautiful inside and out! Keep strong!! Sending Prayers and hugs out to you!!
My love, prayers and good wishes go out to you and your family during your recovery ❤
get well soon!
lauren..take care of yourself..i am praying for your speedy recovery..i admire your positivity and strength during this trying time!
God be with you
May prayers go out to you and your family.
From one Texas girl to another, many blessings and prayers are sent your way. You are such an inspiration and God will bring you through this. You are always a beautiful person and have a glorious heart and soul!!!! God Bless!!!!
Grenade Hot Potato, EVER PLAY IT!
B )
Im an Atheist, there is no such thing as god. So the strength that you seem to be summoning up is all you lady. I never heard of you before until I got to the beach at Ft Lauderdale. I pulled up Yahoo on my smart phone and the headline was unbelievable. Lady into propeller. I feel so bad for you, its a bad break for sure. But you are young, and that means everything. You still have your whole life ahead of you. You survived which means you are over the hump. Yes a few doors may be closed now. But a ton of new doors will open. You survived, so take this second lease on life and live it to the fullest. Its a beautifull world out there that you can enjoy, no matter how many scars you have. I wish you a great life ahead young lady. 🙂
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Come sei bella e forte. Posso vedere voi attraverso i vostri occhi e sorriso. Siete speciali in molti modi. Essere libera e essere qualcuno. Sogni d’oro Lo……….
Nè Creator nè creatura fu senz’ amore
Im so sorry to hear of your accident. You look like you have such a kind soul, I’m certain you will always have the ability to shine.
I just want to Point something out as a precaution …Commenter “Love Sent” gives a long, seemingly fictional account of her personal tragedy. joyce bernann mckinney, yikes.
Miss Wyoming 1973: Michele Walter
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My name is Ana, I live in Brazill and I read about what happened to you a while back. I just wanted to tell you that you are a very/very strong woman, a great example for others. I love to read about your developments every now and than, and I know that you have a great deal of friends, and a wonderful family to support you. That is the most important thing in your life. Hang in there!
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Lauren – Was curious who made your prosethic eye?. Its looks great! I lost my left eye when I was young to cancer. Hope you’re doing well.
Tim
Hi! I just wanna say that you are really inspiring, and I LOVE your book!!
Hi Lauren. My name is Raquel and I’m from Brazil.
I knew about your story because I’m translating your book to portuguese. I want to say that it’s very inspiring. I didn’t have an accident, but I identify myself with a lot of feelings you describe in the book.
God bless you and your family!
Raquel.
I just finished your book!!! Could not put it down! And almost cried through the entire thing. It is a beautifully written book! Lauren you are a beautiful and inspriation women! You give me hope to be a better Christian and the strength to never give up! Thank you for sharing your story and your warriorism! 🙂 I don’t know you, but I love you! And I continue to pray for you and your family! 🙂